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Busting 5 Common Sleep Myths

lbenjell • Nov 08, 2021
Raise your hands if you’ve been asked if you’ve been asked if your baby was a “good sleeper”. Keep them up if you’ve been asked if they “slept through the night”… And keep them up if you answered no and somebody gave you unsolicited advice about how to achieve the holy grail of parenthood, or sleeping through the night. I’m sure that most of you had your hands up throughout the entire exercise. If you’ve been a mama for a hot second, you know that we need all the advice we can get, but only if we ask for it and ONLY if it is good or accurate advice. No unsolicited advice please, and definitely no second-source stories or how your second cousin once removed’s baby slept through the night from the day he became 6 months old.

I’ve seen and worked with enough babies to see that no baby is like the other, and no solution fits all. Each family has their own ways and their own systems and what works for one may not work for the other. But what I know for sure is that your baby’s sleep is not a reflection of your motherhood. You are not a “bad” mother because your baby is a “bad” sleeper. If those tags or adjectives can even ever be used (maybe a topic for another blog?).

I think an important part of being able to even be a parent is to have access to good reliable information. Knowledge empowers us to make good decisions.  

Myth : Keep baby up during the day, they will sleep better at night

Fact: Naps are an important element of your baby’s sleep needs. A baby who does not nap properly during the day will most likely be awake for longer periods than they can tolerate and will not get the number of hours of sleep that they need. This means that baby will be overtired at bedtime, leading to fussiness, resistance to sleep and difficulty staying asleep.  

Myth : They will sleep when they are tired

Fact: When babies are tired and sleep deprived, they will produce more cortisol than they need to which will make them more active and alert. This means that waiting for your baby to feel tired and decide to fall asleep, without providing them the opportunity to go to sleep will backfire.

Myth : Feed them formula or solids to sleep better

Fact: There is no evidence linking a heavier/certain type of feed will guarantee that your baby will sleep better. It is important that your baby gets the appropriate calorie intake in order to feel full but that does not have to be concentrated right before bed, it can be evenly spread out throughout the day. And the kind of feeding will depend on their age and developmental needs. But feeding a baby a heavy meal right before going to bed will likely cause more harm than good as baby’s digestive system will be working hard at processing that food intake which will likely interrupt their sleep. Imagine eating a double portion of your usual meals right before dozing off. What will that do to your sleep?

Myth : Don’t let your baby get used to sleeping in your arms

Fact: Newborns need their parents’ help to navigate the world. They need help to feed, stay clean and warm, they also need help to sleep. As they grow, they develop the capacity to learn to sleep and you can do that should you wish to. But rocking/holding/feeding to sleep are perfectly good ways to put baby to sleep as long as it is making you and baby happy.

Myth : Your baby will outgrow this

Fact: There is no certain age by which all babies learn to sleep through the night. Some will come to it when certain conditions are met and others will not. Of course, certain developmental prerequisites are needed to help baby do that but there is no particular age at which your baby will definitely sleep better. 
By lbenjell 20 May, 2024
In the hustle and bustle of modern life, sleep often takes a back seat to other priorities. Yet, the importance of sleep for mental health cannot be overstated, especially for parents and their children. From infancy through adulthood, sleep plays a crucial role in maintaining emotional stability, cognitive function, and overall well-being. Let’s delve into the intricate relationship between sleep and mental health, exploring its significance for both parents and kids. Understanding Sleep: The Foundation of Mental Health Sleep is not merely a passive state of rest; it's a dynamic process that facilitates vital functions for physical and mental health. During sleep, the brain consolidates memories, processes emotions, and regulates various physiological processes. For children, especially infants and toddlers, sleep is paramount for healthy growth and development. It's during sleep that their brains form crucial neural connections, essential for learning and behavior regulation. Sleep and Parental Mental Health For parents, particularly those with young children, sleep deprivation is often a common occurrence. The demands of caring for a newborn or attending to the needs of a growing child can disrupt sleep patterns, leading to chronic sleep deficits. This chronic sleep deprivation can take a toll on parental mental health in several ways: Increased Stress and Anxiety : Sleep-deprived parents often experience heightened stress levels and anxiety. The constant fatigue and inability to get adequate rest can exacerbate feelings of overwhelm and tension. Impaired Cognitive Function : Lack of sleep impairs cognitive function, making it difficult for parents to concentrate, make decisions, and problem-solve effectively. This can further contribute to feelings of inadequacy and frustration. Mood Disorders : Chronic sleep deprivation is linked to an increased risk of mood disorders such as depression and irritability. Parents may find themselves more prone to mood swings and emotional instability, impacting their ability to nurture a positive environment for their children. Strained Relationships : Sleep deprivation can strain relationships, leading to conflicts and communication breakdowns between partners. This can create additional stressors, further exacerbating mental health challenges. Sleep and Child Mental Health Just as sleep is crucial for parental well-being, it's equally essential for children's mental health and development. Adequate sleep is associated with numerous benefits for children, including: Emotional Regulation : Sufficient sleep plays a vital role in emotional regulation, helping children manage their feelings and behaviors effectively. Children who get enough sleep are often more resilient to stress and less prone to mood disturbances. Cognitive Development : Sleep is essential for cognitive development in children, as it supports learning, memory consolidation, and problem-solving skills. A well-rested child is better equipped to succeed academically and socially. Behavioral Health : Sleep disturbances in children are closely linked to behavioral problems such as hyperactivity, impulsivity, and aggression. Establishing healthy sleep habits early on can significantly reduce the risk of such issues. Reduced Risk of Mental Health Disorders : Research suggests that inadequate sleep during childhood is associated with an increased risk of mental health disorders later in life, including anxiety, depression, and ADHD. Strategies for Promoting Healthy Sleep Given the critical role of sleep in mental health for both parents and children, it's essential to prioritize sleep hygiene and establish healthy sleep habits. Here are some strategies to promote better sleep: Consistent Bedtime Routine: Establish a consistent bedtime routine for both parents and children. A calming bedtime routine signals to the body that it's time to wind down and prepare for sleep. Create a Sleep-Conducive Environment: Ensure that the bedroom environment is conducive to sleep . This includes keeping the room dark, quiet, and at a comfortable temperature. Limit Screen Time: Minimize screen time, especially before bedtime, as exposure to screens can interfere with melatonin production and disrupt sleep patterns. Encourage Physical Activity: Regular physical activity during the day can promote better sleep at night. Encourage children to engage in active play and ensure that parents incorporate exercise into their daily routine as well. Healthy Sleep Associations: Help children develop healthy sleep associations by associating bedtime with soothing activities such as reading or gentle music. Practice Mindfulness and Relaxation Techniques: Teach children and parents relaxation techniques such as deep breathing exercises or guided imagery to promote relaxation and stress relief before bedtime. Seek Professional Help When Needed: If sleep problems persist despite implementing these strategies, seek guidance from a healthcare professional or sleep specialist. You can always schedule a discovery call with me to discuss whether working with me will help your little one get a better night sleep. For parents and children alike, prioritizing sleep is essential for maintaining emotional well-being, cognitive function, and overall health. By recognizing the importance of sleep and implementing strategies to promote healthy sleep habits, parents can nurture a positive sleep environment for themselves and their children, laying the foundation for a lifetime of mental wellness.
By lbenjell 24 Apr, 2024
Sleep is the cornerstone of our well-being, especially for children whose growing bodies and minds depend on it for optimal development. As parents, we often hear about the significance of sleep, yet understanding the specific needs of our children at different stages of their lives can be the key to ensuring they thrive. In this comprehensive guide, we'll delve into the importance of sleep for children and explore the recommended amount of sleep they need from birth into their teenage years. Birth to 12 Months: During the first year of life, sleep is not just vital; it's foundational. Infants spend a significant portion of their time sleeping, with newborns needing around 14-17 hours of sleep per day. As they grow, the total sleep hours gradually decrease, but the importance remains unchanged. Sleep is crucial for their physical growth, cognitive development, and emotional well-being. Establishing healthy sleep habits early on can lay the groundwork for a lifetime of restful sleep. 1 to 3 Years Old: Toddlers are bundles of energy, constantly exploring the world around them. Despite their boundless enthusiasm, they still require ample sleep to support their rapid development. Children aged 1 to 3 years typically need about 12-14 hours of sleep per day, including naps. Consistent bedtime routines and a conducive sleep environment can help toddlers settle into a restful night's sleep, setting the stage for their busy days ahead. 4 to 6 Years Old: As children transition into preschoolers and embark on new adventures, their sleep needs evolve yet again. Preschool-aged children typically require 10-12 hours of sleep per night. Quality sleep at this stage is essential for consolidating learning, enhancing memory, and regulating emotions. Encouraging a consistent sleep schedule and minimizing screen time before bedtime can promote healthier sleep habits in young children. 7 to 12 Years Old: As children enter the school-age years, the demands of academics, extracurricular activities, and social interactions can sometimes encroach on their sleep. However, prioritizing sleep remains crucial for their overall well-being. School-aged children generally need 9-11 hours of sleep each night. Adequate sleep supports cognitive function, academic performance, and physical health. By fostering a sleep-friendly environment and promoting a regular bedtime routine, parents can help their children meet their sleep needs even amidst busy schedules. Teenage Years: The teenage years mark a period of significant change, both physically and emotionally. Amidst academic pressures, social activities, and technological distractions, teenagers often find themselves grappling with sleep deprivation. Yet, prioritizing sleep during adolescence is more critical than ever. Teenagers typically require 8-10 hours of sleep per night, yet many fall short of this recommendation. Sleep plays a vital role in adolescent development, impacting mood regulation, cognitive function, and physical health. Establishing healthy sleep habits, such as limiting caffeine intake and creating a sleep-conducive environment, can empower teenagers to prioritize rest and reap the benefits of adequate sleep. Sleep is not a luxury; it's a necessity, especially for children whose growing bodies and minds depend on it for optimal development. From birth through the teenage years, the importance of sleep remains constant, evolving alongside the child's changing needs. By understanding the recommended amount of sleep for each stage of childhood and implementing strategies to support healthy sleep habits, parents can empower their children to thrive and reach their full potential. If you find that your children are falling short of the recommended hours of sleep or struggling with sleep-related challenges, don't hesitate to take action. A personalized approach to addressing sleep issues can make a world of difference for your family. I invite you to book a discovery call with me at One2Sleep Consulting. Together, we can explore your family's unique sleep needs and develop a tailored plan to promote restful sleep and overall well-being for your children. Let's embark on this journey toward better sleep together. Your family's good night's sleep starts here.
By lbenjell 06 Jun, 2023
You are sitting peacefully watching a movie when you hear your little one scream. It’s the middle of the night and you are convinced they are having a nightmare. But when you go check, your baby is unconsolable. It is as if they are not recognizing your presence. So was it a night mare or something else? In most cases, when sleep is disturbed, our babes are most likely having a nightmare. But sometimes, it turns out to be a night terror instead. So what’s the difference between the two and how can we help our little ones get through each one. What is a nightmare? A nightmare is a bad dream that can cause the person experiencing it fright or distress. Children generally start having nightmares between the ages of 2 and 3 years but some start as early as 2 years old. Nightmares generally happen in the REM stages of sleep or in other words in the later part of the night. A child having a nightmare can wake up and remember the content of the dream and even feel distressed as a result. What triggers a nightmare? Nightmares can be triggered by a number of things. It can be something that they are worried about, something they heard a story about or even something they watched on TV. That is why I always ask parents to do a quick audit of who their little one is spending time with and what they are watching. Something that an older cousin or sibling said in passing can really stay with the little ones. How can I help my child after a nightmare? Immediately after the episode (or in the middle of the night) soothe and comfort your baby and help them go back to sleep — however that may look like for your family. Once the initial shock/fear has passed, spend time the next day talking to your little one about the dream. Was it scary? how did it make them feel? Make sure you validate those feelings as they are very real to them but also put them in context: dreams are works of our imaginary and we can retell the narrative differently. Is there a way to turn the monster into something funny? Can the bad story in the dream have a happy ending? Help them focus on their ability to imagine good things instead of dwelling on the scary aspect of the dream. What is a night terror? Similar to a nightmare, a Night terror is a parasomnia that can disturb our kiddo’s sleep. This one happens in the deep NREM portion of sleep which means earlier in the night. A child experiencing a night terror may sleep walk or scream but may not recognize your efforts to soothe them or calm them down. The next day, your little one will have absolutely no recollection of the episode. What triggers night terrors? Night terrors can be hereditary so if someone in your family has experience with them, it might explain why your little one is having them. But night terrors can also be caused by overtiredness so offering more sleep can help reduce their frequency. How can I help my child through or after a night terror? In these cases, it is best to accompany your baby in their terror and keep them safe, without waking them. The episode will ride out and they will be out of it in a few minutes. Chatting about it the next day is probably not going to help as this is not something that they will be able to recall. Has your child experienced night terrors? I would love to hear more.
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